I Self-Destruct?

We always seem to self-destruct in an attempt to screw the gloom over our tired minds.

We drink, smoke, tear our ear-drums with loud music and losers go to an extent of indulging in narcotics.

I do a couple of the above.

I drink coffee in excess when I need a sanctum.

I rip apart my inner-ear coils with Metal music at every possible opportunity.

What do I get?

An illusion that my thoughts are somewhere else…

And I know it’s an illusion.

Also, I stare into oblivion while doing the tasks above.

And that makes me fall deeper and deeper and deeper…

Some things are made to last and they should.

When they don’t, it seems as if the entire universe has conspired to make it all go wrong!

(Now where have I read the exact opposite?)

And I decide to take on the Universe for that one folly.

Things I can’t stand:
Helplessness when my better half is crying on the other side of phone

Illogical end to a perfectly wonderful thing which was made to last

And things, I shall change.

I won’t self-destruct this time…

I shall attempt to construct a Turquoise colored dream full of White Lilies.(Don’t ask)